Can't Win

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20110130

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Can't Win




It seems that time spent doing things flies by and time spent not doing things moves slowly. I've been sick the last few days, but luckily have had few responsibilities for schoolwork, and have been faced with a lot of time to spend as I wish.

I think it's because of how fractured my attention usually is that I long to sink into some deep, elaborate, escapist entertainment for a few hours and then resurface. And with a snow day Thursday, my illness keeping me from all but one class Friday, and now the weekend, I've apparently had great opportunity to do this. And I sort of did. I watched V for Vendetta for what must've been the 15th time yesterday, and I enjoyed the ride, although I turned it off with about 10-15 minutes left, because the good parts were over.

But my point is that the observation I opened with has not held true, and despite dozens of consecutive hours with little to no pressing concerns (a rarity in college as I'm sure you know), time has not felt slow, and I haven't really done anything.

I tried to write a funny little document mocking General Education in colleges, and it was meh. I was going to convert it to script format since I felt it needed sound effects, but I didn't. I tried to flesh out a story idea that's been dancing in the shadows and cracks of my mind for over a month, and to some minor extent I did, but it's still just glimpses surrounded in darkness. I tried to meet the characters and learn something about their lives, but I can't hear their voices and can only see a few faces. I wanted to write up something about Farscape, a show that I both love and sometimes feel ashamed of, but I still haven't put my thoughts down (my desire in writing it is to better understand for myself why I am so pulled to it, when it has so many obvious shortcomings). I didn't do any homework. I didn't read a book. I didn't work on applications for internships. I didn't write anything for The Breeze.

I'm not upset but... what the hell have I done?

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J-Mads

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Can't Win :: Comments

Post on Sun Jan 30, 2011 6:50 pm by dohnage18

My weekend was the exactly the same. I did nothing at all.

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Post on Sun Jan 30, 2011 8:41 pm by AgentW

get a job?

they're useful for filling in such times, and get money too!

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Post on Tue Feb 01, 2011 11:37 pm by strangerthanfiction

jobs are cool, my job is even cooler because I only work weekdays and I'm in a library and I get to touch old books all the time

I know this feeling sadly all too well

on the other hand you could just talk to me on facebook about the sabres or about stuff that is not the sabres...

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Post on Fri Feb 04, 2011 10:17 pm by AgentW

I wish I worked in a library. I just saw this awesome oversize book of the street plans of paris from like the early 20s or so. pretty awesome.

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Post on Sun Feb 06, 2011 6:55 pm by strangerthanfiction

yeah well I've touched thomas jefferson's signature
so there!
(also I get to work with massive books like that on a regular basis so I find that stuff insanely cool)

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